Financier, Friend or Father — Part One

Money TreeAs Dads, we have a lot of roles to play as part of our overall responsibility to the family.  This is especially true when it comes to the relationship that we have with our children.  In a brief three part series I plan to consider three particular roles that we play in our children’s lives.

Financier – “What am I made of?  Money?”

I think one of the things that is the hardest for us to understand early in the life of our family is understanding what level of importance to place on the role of money within the family.  And one of the traps that young fathers fall into is the trap of believing that our primary role is to provide financially for our family.  Don’t get me wrong.  Providing is important.

I have no patience for a man who is lazy.  My dad was one of the hardest working men I have ever known.  I can count the number of days he missed work during his career on one hand and have multiple fingers left over.  I strive to be that kind of man.

But the trap is throwing ourselves so strongly into work and getting ahead that we neglect our wives and children.  We focus on the overtime and impressing the boss so that we can the next raise and we have nothing left in our tank when we get home at night.  We are too tired to go out in the yard and play with our kids.  We stumble off to bed after supper without so much as a word of adult conversation with our wife who is desperate for just a little of our time.  And our reason is this.  We are tired after working all day to provide a good living for our family.

Let me prove my point here.  Pause for a minute and ask your wife this simple question. Ask her word for word.   “If you had a choice between an extra paycheck this month or me taking a day off from work and spending it together as a family, which would you choose?”

Go ahead.  Ask her.  What did she say?  — I thought so.  She, and especially your children, will choose YOU over money every time.

So why don’t we act like it?

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I am the husband of a beautiful and wonderful woman. I am the father of two of the greatest kids on the planet. I am a father-in-law to a great young woman. And I am Papa to three very special grandchildren. In my spare time I am an active blogger and writer. And if there is any time left over, I work with small non-profit organizations and churches on the topics of change management, crisis intervention and leadership development.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.