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What does it mean to be a Tactical Teammate?

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Tactical Teammate - 3What does it mean to be a Tactical Teammate?

It seems everywhere we look these days there is someone or something advertising a new product that is tactical. It seems to me that it is just a good way to charge a little more or to make something a little more interesting. One of the best definitions of Tactical that I have seen is this: “of, relating to, used in or involving small military operations, typically close to the base, with speed and efficiency and with less long term significance”. My background dictates that I have a slightly different definition, so I say tactical is having definite and specific goals, or being of a specific military or military-like design.

So I am sure you are asking; “What does this have to do with being a team mate? Or how can I apply this thinking to my team?” Let’s look at it from two ways, the corporate world, and our families.

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Manhood is a struggle

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Benjamin Disraeli

Such are the words of Benjamin Disraeli.  His actual and full quote is as follows:

“Youth is a blunder; Manhood a struggle, Old age a regret.”

For those who are unfamiliar, Benjamin Disraeli was one of the Prime Ministers of Great Britain.  Actually, he served as PM twice in his long career in British Parliament and politics.  He was a key figure in creating what became the modern Conservative Party.  There is much debate on his overall role in the pantheon of conservative thought.  But, he was quite the literary figure as well.

The quote above is from a political novel, Coningsby.  This novel set in the 1830s the life and career of Henry Coningsby, an orphan grandson of a wealthy marquess, Lord Monmouth. Lord Monmouth initially disapproved of Coningsby’s parents’ marriage, but on their death he relents, decides to provide for the boy and sends young Coningsby to be educated at Eton College. At Eton Coningsby meets and befriends Oswald Millbank, the son of a rich cotton manufacturer who is a bitter enemy of Lord Monmouth. The two older men represent old and new wealth in society.

As Coningsby grows up he begins to develop his own liberal political views and he falls in love with Oswald’s sister Edith. When Lord Monmouth discovers these developments he is furious and secretly disinherits his grandson. On his death, Coningsby is left penniless, and is forced to work for his living. He decides to study law and to become a barrister. This proof of his character impresses Edith’s father (who had previously also been hostile) and he consents to their marriage at last. By the end of the novel Coningsby is elected to Parliament for his new father-in-law’s constituency and his fortune is restored.

If you decide to dive into this book, you will find the quote above.  Don’t bother.

Here is my point for Manday today.

I acknowledge that my youth has been full of blunders.  There have been too many to recount here.  And I will admit that manhood has at times proven to be a struggle.  But, I refuse to reach old age and have regrets.  I refuse to live life without giving it my all in my struggle to be the man that God called me to be, the husband that my wife needs me to be, the father that my children need me to be and the “Papa” that my grandchildren need me to be.

What about you today?  Are you struggling a little?  Then join the crowd.  But join with us and fight the good fight and let’s overcome together!

 

Photo credit: Political Graveyard / Foter / CC BY
Photo credit: Gwynhafyr / Foter / CC BY-NC

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Without a vision . . . Without a leader . . .

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DSC_1167

I have heard many provide insight into the popular passage from Proverbs 29:18.  In fact, I wrote about this very same passage back on January 1st of this year.  In case you are not familiar with it, it goes like this:

Where there is no vision, the people perish.

It is often used as an exhortation to go out and do something big.  Something that requires great vision.  And without something big to strive for, folks will surely die.  Now, I could discuss what that verse may really be saying, but for purposes of this leadership blog I will stick with one of the more common applications of the verse.

The application of that verse that is most common would call us to greatness and to do things that we cannot see with our own eyes.  But consider for a moment the execution of that verse.  Vision is great and I am all for it.  But vision without leadership is nearly pointless.  If people perish without a vision, I think that without a leader they will wander aimlessly in search of direction.

You and I are leaders.  We are called to lead.  Let’s align ourselves with a vision.  Or let’s collectively seek the vision of those among us with those skills.  And then let’s pursue that vision with energy, enthusiasm and with discipline.  Let’s see the vision and then say follow me!  I know how to get us there!

“Where there is no vision the people perish”
Proverbs 29:18

“Where there is no leadership the people wander aimlessly.”
K.E. Bowser

 

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Our sons need us to be a “Purity and Respect Model and Monitor” – Week 7

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Needs - Week 7 - 1Our sons need us to model and monitor purity and respect for them.

That doesn’t sound very fun, does it? And what does it even mean?

It means that our sons need us to model purity and respect for him and monitor his ability to follow our example.

Most fathers would never intentionally instruct their son into a potentially destructive habit like alcoholism or drug dependence. Yet that’s exactly what can happen if we aren’t intentionally modeling purity for them, demonstrating respect for those around us respect and helping them remain “pure” in their thoughts and actions.

This is why I say you must be a “purity and respect” model and monitor.

Needs - Week 7 - 2Many young men have lost their sense of respect, and it especially shows in their speech. They trash talk, curse, and make crude jokes about those who they view as being less significant than themselves. They denigrate women or use foul language in front of children. Somewhere along the way, someone failed to correct their behavior. Most often it was due to the lack of a strong father in the home. And they learned how to deal with others through late night on HBO.

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Looking Silly or Feeling Confident

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Looking Silly, Feeling Confident - 1Leadership and confidence usually go hand in hand. But sometimes you feel awkward or even silly. You may feel silly and awkward inside, but you can learn to overcome those feelings. You can develop the ability to both look and feel confident even though you feel silly.

Looking Silly, Feeling Confident - 3Researchers tell us that the number one fear of most people is the fear of public speaking or some other public exposure. Now, in full disclosure, I will admit that I have never suffered from that fear. I was a “theater guy”. I loved being on stage. Many years ago my wife and I owned our own business where I was a paid professional public speaker. I have made a living standing and talking in front of a crowd. It doesn’t scare me – it energizes me. But I realize that I am the oddball in this regard. (Maybe some other regards as well . . .)

Here are a few tips and suggestions to help you get over the fear of looking silly and also help you gain and portray confidence to those around you.

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What happens when it’s the Leader that is failing the Team?

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Leader Failing the Team - 1For almost everyone, having a job means working on teams. But not all team leaders know how to create successful teams. They do not know how to lead either by building consensus, setting agendas, meeting deadlines, encouraging good ideas, and so on. In fact, many team leaders are thrown into the role without training in any of these areas. If your leader seems to be less than fully competent or committed, there are ways you can make the experience bearable, and even successful, without stepping on toes.

Maybe your leader isn’t setting the most positive course for the team. But you should still be the kind of person you’d want to work with. Before you start casting stones at others, make sure your team behavior is exemplary. Are you on time for all meetings? Do you complete your action items? Do you leave your ego at the door? Do you respect other peoples’ ideas and acknowledge their contributions? Do you attempt to build consensus?

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Can You Help Me, Please?

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Can You Help Me PleaseNature vs. Nurture — Leadership.

I have been pondering this ancient theme for some time and the evidence of its impact really came to light recently in Florida.

Let’s consider first for a moment if you will something equally ridiculous. The law of gravity (nature).

We could pass a law (nurture you), (if it is not already on the books somewhere), that prohibits you from falling. Now that would really be cool because you could no longer “fall down”. We have conquered gravity with the stroke of a pen! Imagine, no more being tripped-up, falling down stairs, or most importantly…no more huge masses of body’s during football games! Injuries would be in huge decline.

Now that law is as ridicules as the one that presented itself in the Florida “teenage bus beating” case a few weeks back. But when viewed through the prism of “nature vs nurture”, what did we really see?

I was involved caring for foster kids at point. To illustrate the nature vs nurture disorder I am drawn back to one particular situation that involved a set of three siblings we had for nearly two years.

There was a relative that lived down the street from us and to say the least the relationship was NOT “mutual”. They had a son (Matt) who was the same age as the oldest sibling (Joe) we were caring for at the time. For weeks on end Joe would come home frustrated because he was being bullied by Matt. I would talk with Joe and settle him down. To try and talk to Matt’s parents was futile at best. It went nowhere.

After about the fourth week and the frustration (nature) building in Joe and the attempts to get him to understand that we were (nurtured) not allowed to let them engage in any activity in which they may be harmed. The next day things come to a boil and the efforts to hold Joe back were failing badly. I took Joe aside…I said look, I understand the frustration (nature) you are dealing with. However, if it gets to the point that you must make a stand for yourself (nature), then you had better

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Best Laid Plans . . .

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Best laid Plans

Well…the week didn’t go so smooth.

Our Leader and Founder of Leadership Voices ventured away on vacation. He delegated authority while he was gone. He kindly asked me, his Number One, to keep an eye on things while he was away. As good leadership should do, he advised me that there were numerous hacking attempts on our site through our hosting provider. This was common but I believe it may have gotten more severe since I posted a rant on Anthony Weiner.

Sure enough, despite my best efforts I was unable to login to post my or any article much less assist anyone. I was locked out. And as a subordinate, I had no administrative access to the website. So I just let things ride…hoping no sordid ads or comments would post on Women’s Wednesday or Team Tuesday or Fatherhood Friday.

That is where the dilemma arose. Should I notify our leader or let him enjoy his vacation?

As a leader would you want to know if things were going awry or would you want to know once you returned?

Now I know our leader will weigh in on this…but I would like to know your thoughts.

Lastly, the world didn’t come to an end. No lives were lost because we didn’t post on our regular days. No animals were harmed because I felt the need to kick a dog in frustration. The blogosphere didn’t collapse. Life went on.

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Our Daughters Need Us to Balance Vision and Expectations – Week 6

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Needs - Week 6 - 3The “vision” that I am talking about has to do with the attitude that a father conveys about who he feels that his daughter is and what he feels that she can become.

All fathers have a vision of what potential is wrapped up in their young lives. And it is our job to cast a vision to their children about what they can become.

However, we must be careful because if we aren’t intentionally positive in the way we influence our children’s future, then we become overbearing and communicate disappointment in what they are or what they are becoming. And being negative or disappointed in your daughter’s present and future can be devastating.

So, what does a negative vision look like?

A negative vision can be downright demanding and demeaning. Negative vision sounds like:

“No kid of mine is going to come home with a report card with C-s on it. What’s wrong with you?”

“Why did you let that girl beat you at the last second?”

Negative vision can also be condemning:

“I know you were talking to that boyfriend on the phone. Why don’t you just tell me the truth? You’re turning into a liar!”

Or, it can be pessimistic and fatalistic:

“Don’t worry about doing well in math; boys are usually better at these subjects.”

On the other hand, a positive vision allows our daughters to see the good in their actions and their character.Needs - Week 6 - 2

So, what does a positive vision look like?

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Strategies for Conflict Resolution in a Team

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Strategy for Conflict Resolution in a Team - 1Leaders must know how to manage conflict with in their team.

Conflict and honest debate among team members can be helpful because it provides an opportunity for team members to see other perspectives on the issues at hand. However, if team conflict cannot be resolved, it can undermine team goals and harm the working relationship between team members. If you understand strategies for resolving conflicts with your team, your team will accomplish more. There are many things to consider here, but the few that I want to focus on are training, depersonalization, the type, the clarification and the resolution process. Finally, I offer a quick call for follow-up.

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