Every man needs accountability. Not the “Gotcha! Now I’m gonna beat you up!” variety that we so fondly remember. This variety leads to legalism and checklist spirituality. Eric Reed, Minister to Men at Houston’s First Baptist Church stated it best, “Men need an accountability that is voluntarily entered into and focused on unleashing each man into the vision that God is calling him.”
The result is not being beat down, but being built up. The Bible calls this edification.
This accountability can be elusive. Many men find accountability so frustrating because we have a tendency to cling to those individuals who flatter and rationalize our actions. They tell us what we want to hear not what we need to hear.
Conversely, we find the accountability that is mired in gossip and guilt. Lack of confidentiality within this circle of accountability turns to regret and distrust.
Because of this rationalization and regret, men live unchallenged lives because we fail to have the intestinal fortitude to have some one come into lives and hold us accountable. So we fumble through life with a false sense of morality when in reality we are lying to ourselves.
Unfortunately, we live in a very passive aggressive society that would rather turn a blind eye to the wrongs of society and allow things to play out instead of getting involved. We cowardly avoid life-on-life connection and harvest shallow relationships. Biblically, historically, and traditionally, men have gotten into trouble, deadly trouble, when they find themselves alone. The result. Failed marriages. Secret addictions from the internet. Licking lips at the desires and lusts that walk by. Weak manhood. Wrecked women. Fatherless children. Aborted souls. Regret. Unforgiveness.
I have been accountable to a group of three men for over 12 years. I call them my 300. These men have my back and I have theirs. I would take a bullet for these men. They have walked with me. Talked with me. Prayed with me. Rejoiced with me. Lifted me. Stood by me. And even slapped me silly through the years. Because of them, I am a better man than I was 12 years ago. And as part of this group, I have joyously returned the favor.
So who am I accountable to? God. Your Creator. First and foremost, you are accountable to the ultimate power in the universe. The Creator of the universe.
Second, if you are married, you are accountable to your spouse. If you are single, you are accountable to your future spouse.
Third, you are accountable to a group of men. A group of men who come together to pursue life transformation through prayer, Bible study, accountability, and transparent connection. Don’t have a group. Find one.
In the weeks to come, we will break down this accountability ‘thing’ further.