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Accountability: Like-Minded versus Life-Minded

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As humans, we have a tendency to gravitate toward like-minded individuals and passions. Our society dictates this model through political correctness, polling, media, rugged individualism, and Climate Change.  (Okay…not so much Climate Change but you catch my drift.)  The danger is we subscribe to it like sheep in relationships and because we are like-minded we are easily deceived and we believe that everything is okay in our little like-minded world.  So we scratch our heads wondering when the wheels fell off the wagon.   But why do we subscribe to it?  Why do we dismiss a need for true meaningful accountability?

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Breakfast was served!

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It was great to be a man this morning and to be a part of a great fellowship breakfast.  All I can say is that if you are local to Houston, TX and you missed it, then you really missed it!  Our own Rene Rivera spoke to a group of 35 men of all ages this morning on the subject of Biblical Manhood and Accountability.  And he was spot on!  His use of the term “Life-minded” is something that I hope he will develop further for our audience.

What this culture needs above almost all else is strong Godly men to lead their families.  Men who realize that this is not a sled dog race and that we don’t lead from the back.

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But the day would not have happened if it hadn’t been for the vision of Billy Long, Randy Meekes and a few others at our first Author’s Breakfast a few weeks ago.  Six men met at a Denny’s on a Saturday recently to strategize and plan for the development and growth of LeadershipVoices.  One of the things that was clear that morning was that there is a need for men to meet together and fellowship.  And today certainly proved it as we experienced this morning.

One of the things that came out of this morning is a new focus area for the blog.  Rene will be moving his posting activity from Thursdays and will launch what we are tentatively calling “Manhood Monday” this coming Monday.  Each week he will develop some tidbit that can be used to make us men better leaders in our homes, jobs, churches and in our culture.  I am looking forward to what Rene brings to the blog each week.  What about you?

If you have an idea for a better title than Manhood Monday then reply  or comment with your idea.

 

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Financier, Friend or Father — Part Three

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father-son-13_lIn parts one and two we looked at two of the many roles that a father plays.  We looked at him as financier where he has a role in being a provider for the family.  But we saw that being a provider is not what our family needs from us the most.  We then looked at his role as a friend and how hard it is to be something much more than our child’s buddy.  In this, our last installment of the series, I want to explore the most important role that a man will play in life and his relationship to his children.

Father – “Father knows best.”

>Boy, I really wish this last statement were true 100% of the time.  We all know it isn’t.  But at the end of the day, we are responsible.  President Harry S Truman said, “The buck stops here.”  And the “buck” of responsibility stops with the father.  Another way of looking at it is this.  “We may not always be right, but we are always the parent.”  And we need to act accordingly.  We need to step up and make the tough decisions.  We need to make decisions that may be unpopular with our children.  And we will make some bad decisions.  And when we make a bad decision or a mistake, we need to acknowledge it.  Our children will not lose respect for us when we admit a mistake.  In fact, the opposite is true.  They will come to respect us even more by seeing that we love and respect them enough to acknowledge when we have failed them.Father and Son Blurred

I think homes in America today are places of “Fatherhood Vacuums”.  Divorce has ravaged our families, our homes and our society.  And so often, Mom has had to step in to fill the void left by an absent father.  There can even be fatherhood voids in homes where the father still remains.  How tragic is that when a father is present physically but absent emotionally?

So what is my point today? 

My point is this.  Is it my role primarily to provide for the needs of my family if possible?  Absolutely!  But that is not the most important role that I have.  Is it my role to be a friend to my children and build a relationship of closeness and camaraderie?  Absolutely!  But of the three roles, financier, friend and father, being a real father is the most important of them all.

Go be a “father” today!

Photo credit: Thomas Leuthard / Foter.com / CC BY
Photo credit: Tojosan / Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA

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Seeking Leadership

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Hiker StuffI have seen lots of good things written about leadership, both here and in other forums, but, I had a thought today. I thought about maybe what drives me the most

How do we find the people who are seeking leaders to lead them?

Do those people exist? Isn’t that the real reason that we strive to be leaders? Does a leader actually have to have followers to be a leader? Or is leadership like integrity? Do you know the old saying, “Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking”?

I wonder if seeking leadership is like

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Accessible or Aloof

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AloofReading Michael Hyatt’s blog early this morning I saw his recounting of a podcast by Andy Stanley, a well-known pastor in the Atlanta, GA metropolitan area. Andy Stanley is of the opinion that the greater or higher the level of leadership that a person reaches, the less accessible they must make themselves.

Andy Stanley is quoted as saying:

“The harsh reality of leadership is that the more successful we are, the less accessible we become. As things grow and as more people become involved, a leader can’t be equally accessible to all people. So then we are faced with the dilemma of who gets my time and who doesn’t, when do they get it, and how much of it do they get.”

l sort of equate that to the movie star who becomes famous by making movies.  And then they go on countless TV interviews to become even more famous.  And then they complain because they never have any privacy.  Does that sound familiar?

l would submit to you that the things that made a great leader great are the same things that will keep them great. And one of those things is accessibility and approach-ability.  Every person needs a certain amount of privacy and down time. And as followers we need to recognize and respect that.  But I don’t see a significant reason for someone to become markedly less accessible in order to become more effective.

Absence, or aloofness, doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. It makes the heart wander. And the opposite of accessible could be defined as aloof. And who thinks that is a leadership trait?

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Sometimes it just doesn’t make sense

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Diseased HandThe story of Naaman has an interesting leadership lesson for us today. Naaman was the commander-in-chief of the ancient Syrian army. He was a man with both position and power. By all earthly standards, Naaman was a recognized leader: he had worldly abilities, fame, respect and authority.

However, Naaman had a really big problem. He had leprosy. In that day and time, leprosy was an awful incurable disease. It required total isolation from everyone for fear of spreading the dreaded disease. And it is really hard to be a leader when you have to be isolated from everyone that you are leading.

Can you just imagine for a few minutes

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Accountability. Who needs it? (Part One)

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Every man needs accountability.  Not the “Gotcha! Now I’m gonna beat you up!” variety that we so fondly remember.  This variety leads to legalism and checklist spirituality.    Eric Reed, Minister to Men at Houston’s First Baptist Church stated it best, “Men need an accountability that is voluntarily entered into and focused on unleashing each man into the vision that God is calling him.”

The result is not being beat down, but being built up. The Bible calls this edification.

This accountability can be elusive.  Many men find accountability so frustrating because we have a tendency to cling to those individuals who flatter and rationalize our actions.  They tell us what we want to hear not what we need to hear.

Conversely, we find

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Take a Walk to the Gemba

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So that is what the process looks like?

So that is the process?

My company is making a management system change to “Value Stream Management”. VSM’s goal is to align all resources including management into a stream of production. It is not a change that will occur over night and will require patience, open communication and an attitude of staying the course with an open mind.

I was sent to a training session on Value Stream Management and one of the opening directions to those who represent leadership positions in the organization struck a chord with me. The term used was called “Gemba”, which is a Japanese term meaning “the real place” or “the place where truth can be found”. The meaning is interchanged with other terms within the lean manufacturing world, as in “go see” as catch phrases. However the direction given was this when explaining the Gemba to us in training: If someone comes up to you with a problem and you are in your office, get up out of your chair and go see the problem.

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Leadership and Ambition

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julius-casar_l“When the gods wish to take vengeance on a man for his crimes they usually grant him considerable success and a period of impunity, so that when his fortune is reversed he will feel it all the more bitterly.”

Julius Caesar

Ambition is among the strongest and most creative forces in the arsenal of human psychology and frequently the reason that things get done. It also is one of the most dangerous – that drive to grab the biggest slice of the pie before anyone else and sometimes even the entire pie. Julius Caesar (101-44 BC) had plenty of ambition. Early in his career he happened upon a bust of Alexander the Great. Comparing himself to the great king, Caesar lamented that he was the same age as Alexander had been when he died but that by age thirty-two Alexander had conquered a world and so far he had done practically nothing. Vowing that would change, Caesar entered the Roman political arena and the rest is history.

Is ambition required for leadership?

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Advice to a Thirteen Year Old Boy

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 My youngest son is turning thirteen years old in February.

As a family, we perform a Manhood Ceremony for our boys.

Two years ago, we had a very intimate family gathering where we presented our oldest several items signifying his journey into Manhood.  These items are reminders of his role as a Man and some were challenges as he grows in adulthood.

The evening was amazing.  Parents and grandparents prayed and bestowed gifts to our oldest on his birthday.  As a father, I passed on the blessing to my first born.  I gave him permission to pursue Biblical manhood and I promised to be there to guide him.

One item I gave my oldest was

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