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Manday Quote: Insecure Leadership

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My Senior Pastor Gregg Matte made many penetrating statements in a recent sermon that caught my attention.  But there is always that one  “SQUIRREL” moment when my pastor mentions leadership in his message.

“Insecure leaders make people-pleasing their priority instead of leading.”

Pastor Gregg was providing a breakdown of all the Herods listed in the Bible from Jesus’ birth to the preaching of Paul.  Our Pastor noted that one of the Herods became so enamored with the positive response of the Jews after he beheaded James, the brother of John.  He was so encouraged by the response, Herod decided to arrest Peter in an attempt to please the Jewish masses.  Herod became a people-pleaser.

The Senior Pastor then went on to confess that he has chosen the path of people-pleasing  and will probably do that in the future.  Now…he wasn’t comparing himself to Herod.  But as a leader, Pastor Gregg was admitting that it is human nature to accept insecurity and grasp at anything to please critics and followers instead of making the hard decisions and leading.

I have done it.  It is the path of least resistance.  I forfeited the opportunity to lead for the accolades and “likes” of men.

Men can have this tendency to choose the people-pleasing route instead of leading.

 

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Our Sons Need Us to Help Them Make a Life Plan – Week 9

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Needs - Week 9 - 1Dad, do you have a plan to help your son become a real man?

You’ve heard the maxim: If you fail to plan, you may as well plan to fail. Or, as I heard in a sermon illustration many years ago: “A porpoise without a purpose in bounder flounder.”  (I guess you had to be there . . .)

Your son needs a father who is thinking about his son’s future and taking action to prepare them for that future—whether we’re talking about tomorrow, next week, next year, or ten years from now.

So, what should we help them to plan for? They will need at least the following:

They will need to plan for a vocation. They may have many jobs before they settle in to a career. But they need a plan on how to start. You can help your son plan for his vocational future by:

  • Helping him explore a wide variety of interests and hobbies. Is he gifted at music? Has he been to space camp? Is he a superstar athlete? Is he a writer? Is he a builder? He won’t know unless he tries.
  • Helping your son brainstorm about career possibilities, and then exposing him to jobs that might interest him. You can do this well before high school. If he wants to be doctor, see if you can take a tour of a hospital and ask a doctor some questions about being a medical professional.
  • Trying not to talk negatively about your own career. Those comments muttered under your breath make a big impression on him. Not only do they shape your son’s ideas about your job, they color his impression of work in general.
  • Encouraging an entrepreneurial spirit. Our society needs more business owners and those willing to be creators of jobs for others. Those baby-sitting and lawn-mowing jobs teach your kids that both time and effort have their rewards.

They will need a plan for choosing a life’s mate. Dad, don’t leave your son to learn these things from his friends or some men’s magazine that he picks up. Give him accurate information. Help him really understand the importance of integrity, purity, and respect for women. You can help him plan for a healthy dating and marriage relationship by:

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How to Conduct Team Briefings

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How to conduct team briefings - 1Earlier in the week I discussed team briefings and the importance of communications in the process. But I really didn’t address the mechanics of conducting the team briefing. So, today, let’s focus on that.

As the Leader You Must Commit to a Structure and a Process  It doesn’t necessarily be a super-formal process. But, people must understand what to expect when they attend one of your team briefings.

  • Ensure that you understand what is going on in the organization and that you have been properly briefed yourself. Make sure your team leaders know what’s happening at various levels, and with various other teams, throughout the organization.
  • Provide training or coaching on how to conduct effective team briefings.
  • Recognize and reward supervisors and managers for conducting effective team briefings.
  • Brevity is the soul of wit. If you can’t say it in 15 to 30 minutes, then a team briefing is not the right vehicle for a more complex message.

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Team Briefings

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Team Briefing - 1We have many communication options these days – phone calls, faxes, emails, text messages, and so on. Sometimes it seems as though traditional, face-to-face meetings are disappearing.  It seems that the more options for communicating that we have available, the less real communication occurs.

I am probably one of the only guys at my place of employment without a Bachelor of Science degree.  Most are engineers.  My degree is a lowly Bachelor of Arts degree.  And it is in Mass Communications.  However, I have leveraged it fully throughout my career.  And one of the things that I recall about the communication process is that it has 3 parts and not just 2.  We often think of the “sender” and the “receiver”.  But we often forget the all important ‘feedback”.  And unfortunately, feedback is extremely hard to discern outside of face to face communication.  And even then it is hard to discern.

So, for On the Team Tuesday, let’s look at Team Briefings and what role we have as leaders in that setting.  And let’s consider the characteristics and benefits of well run team briefings. .

The basic characteristics of a team briefing are as follows:

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Manday: Hemingway Quote

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Our own Billy wrote an amazing article based on Col Grossman’s evaluation of the three types of people. Billy’s Sheepdog article is one of the most popular articles at Leadership Voices.  I am a Police Officer.  I consider myself a Sheepdog. I hunt things that go bump in the night.  While you sleep, we, sheepdogs, own the night.

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. -Ernest Hemingway

Recently, I ran across the Hemingway quote emblazoned on the back of a t-shirt designed for Law Enforcement personnel.   The shirt is produced by Certified Wolf Hunter.  I thought I would share it with the leadership blogoshpere.

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Billy and I had a discussion about this…with our leader Kevin stirring it up.

So are you a Sheepdog…or a Wolf Hunter?

 

 

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Get Your Tickets for Mature Manhood Starting Now!

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Get your tickets starting now!  Tickets to the next live event are available now.  The first two events were a great success and we are hoping to build on that success.  We would love you have you join us.  Clear the date and mark your calendars for a great time of food and fellowship.  The topic is “Really Mature Manhood” and you won’t want to miss it.

See the handy form below and the event details that follow.  Then click the “Register” button.  Tickets are free, but we need a headcount for breakfast.

Online Ticketing for Mature Manhood – Men’s Breakfast powered by Eventbrite

Event Details

What would the life of a man who is truly sold-out to being a follower of Christ look like? Do you believe there is more to your walk with Christ than you are experiencing currently?

Join us for an incredible morning of fellowship and challenge. Discover the answers to those questions and what it means to achieve Really Mature Manhood. A joint venture between Northway Church and Leadership Voices, this event promises to be a catalyst for spiritual growth in the lives of men in the Houston area.

The event is absolutely free! Breakfast will be served at 8:00 a.m. with the first speaker beginning at 8:30.  Register now and be sure to invite your friends.

(Northway Church is formerly Cornerstone of The Woodlands.)

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Our Daughter Needs to Know She Is Beautiful – Inside and Out – Week 8

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Needs - Week 8 - 3Until she meets “Mr. Right” (and maybe even after that) you will be the greatest influence on your daughter’s view of herself and all of her many attributes.

So let’s start with the most obvious — Your daughter’s body self-image.  I cannot imagine what it must be like to grow up as a girl in today’s culture. One trip to the grocery store (and I try to avoid that place) tells you all that you need to know about what our culture values when it comes to a girl’s physical appearance. Even after the same magazines that portray a certain unattainable image go on and print an “expose” on how celebrities are airbrushed to carve away pounds and remove natural imperfections in their skin, our daughters still view themselves through the lens of all of those magazines near the check-out stands.

The sad reality is that we live in a world that oftentimes places more emphasis on a girl’s outer beauty than on her inner beauty.  And that emphasis has been since time began.

You have a limited time to influence how she views herself. Don’t waste a moment of it. Tell her early and often that she is as beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside. And emphasize the inner beauty for its lasting qualities that time cannot wrinkle or sag.

So, what about those non-physical attributes? 

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Courage

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Ty Carter -1Courage — A vanishing trait?

While pondering this topic… I’m not so sure I’m all that qualified to write of it, but I will mount the challenge with courage.

Courage is one of those character traits that is not a necessity for leadership but is mandatory!

The development of courage in the right person is to first understand that there is a price pay for following the convictions of their heart. Consider the life of the most recent Medal of Honor winner Sgt. Ty Carter. When Carter spoke with the media he stressed the importance of supporting soldiers both deployed and when the return home from war.

“Know that a soldier or veteran suffering from post-traumatic stress is one of the most passionate and dedicated men or women you will ever meet. Know that they are not damaged. They are simply burdened with living when others did not,” Carter said.

How can we even connect to those thoughts or feelings or know the weight of a burden so heavy?

Here are a few traits connected to courage that need examined.

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What does it mean to be a Tactical Teammate?

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Tactical Teammate - 3What does it mean to be a Tactical Teammate?

It seems everywhere we look these days there is someone or something advertising a new product that is tactical. It seems to me that it is just a good way to charge a little more or to make something a little more interesting. One of the best definitions of Tactical that I have seen is this: “of, relating to, used in or involving small military operations, typically close to the base, with speed and efficiency and with less long term significance”. My background dictates that I have a slightly different definition, so I say tactical is having definite and specific goals, or being of a specific military or military-like design.

So I am sure you are asking; “What does this have to do with being a team mate? Or how can I apply this thinking to my team?” Let’s look at it from two ways, the corporate world, and our families.

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Manhood is a struggle

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Benjamin Disraeli

Such are the words of Benjamin Disraeli.  His actual and full quote is as follows:

“Youth is a blunder; Manhood a struggle, Old age a regret.”

For those who are unfamiliar, Benjamin Disraeli was one of the Prime Ministers of Great Britain.  Actually, he served as PM twice in his long career in British Parliament and politics.  He was a key figure in creating what became the modern Conservative Party.  There is much debate on his overall role in the pantheon of conservative thought.  But, he was quite the literary figure as well.

The quote above is from a political novel, Coningsby.  This novel set in the 1830s the life and career of Henry Coningsby, an orphan grandson of a wealthy marquess, Lord Monmouth. Lord Monmouth initially disapproved of Coningsby’s parents’ marriage, but on their death he relents, decides to provide for the boy and sends young Coningsby to be educated at Eton College. At Eton Coningsby meets and befriends Oswald Millbank, the son of a rich cotton manufacturer who is a bitter enemy of Lord Monmouth. The two older men represent old and new wealth in society.

As Coningsby grows up he begins to develop his own liberal political views and he falls in love with Oswald’s sister Edith. When Lord Monmouth discovers these developments he is furious and secretly disinherits his grandson. On his death, Coningsby is left penniless, and is forced to work for his living. He decides to study law and to become a barrister. This proof of his character impresses Edith’s father (who had previously also been hostile) and he consents to their marriage at last. By the end of the novel Coningsby is elected to Parliament for his new father-in-law’s constituency and his fortune is restored.

If you decide to dive into this book, you will find the quote above.  Don’t bother.

Here is my point for Manday today.

I acknowledge that my youth has been full of blunders.  There have been too many to recount here.  And I will admit that manhood has at times proven to be a struggle.  But, I refuse to reach old age and have regrets.  I refuse to live life without giving it my all in my struggle to be the man that God called me to be, the husband that my wife needs me to be, the father that my children need me to be and the “Papa” that my grandchildren need me to be.

What about you today?  Are you struggling a little?  Then join the crowd.  But join with us and fight the good fight and let’s overcome together!

 

Photo credit: Political Graveyard / Foter / CC BY
Photo credit: Gwynhafyr / Foter / CC BY-NC